Winter is wintering around my porch. Too cold to be out there writing even though
it’s my new favorite spot. Golden,
brown, and red leaves still decorate my oaks and the ground beneath them. Our
house philosophy is “we will remove no leaves before it’s time”. “Time”
means there are no golden, brown or red leaves on the branches. “Time” means that Santa may have to wade
through leaves to get to our house if he approaches from the river side and
misses the rooftop. “Time” means that
our neighbor and lovely friend has generously agree to spend an afternoon
blowing our leaves off the yard and down the hill. “Time” means we might be about to host a
party on the porch—Love those words.
Room to move around and spread out.
We even have a heater on that porch—so far we’ve only used it
twice. Winter has only teased us until
recently.
My porch has proven a cozy spot to write—not today—and a
place for sumptuous meals, naps, and aerobic activity…what? Hmm?? What’s the shift from those previous
porch activities… enter Fred. Actually
Fred probably entered my porch a month or so ago when I brought my plants that
summered in the backyard while my screened porch was in process. Fred previously lived on my “not screened”
porch when those plants lived on my tiny back porch—one could have referred to
it as a “stoop” if it hadn’t had 18+ steps from the river garden.
Fred has shared then new, previously referred to as screened,
back porch with us for several weeks but had managed to stay hidden most days.
Since he frequently showed himself on the stoop while I was watering, and since
river life has accustomed me to all kinds of critters, I was not surprised that
he too preferred my new back porch. It
doesn’t host cats or snakes or birds. Fred is a lizard. A chameleon to be exact. He’s about as big as
my hand—long that is. And he can move
quickly. Fred had winked at me one day
from the eave near the screen door. Duke
Boy was with me so we just winked back.
We knew that Fred would provide that extra protection that can’t always
be provided by screens.
Things were rocking along pretty well for Fred until the
night temperatures dictated a need to move my plants—mainly begonias—indoors. I only gave it a passing thought that Fred
might be hitchhiking indoors from the cold too.
Fred’s cousin, or perhaps twin, had once posed as a lizard statue under
a dishtowel on our kitchen counter during a summer of screened door
openings. I knew it could happen.
What happened instead was Fred showed out sunbathing as if
at the Grand Isle Resort while Queen Elizabeth was also enjoying the pre-winter
sunshine. I saw him but had chosen to
ignore his shameless “own the place” behavior.
What ensued was me, a broom, and Queen E not wanting that thing in her
bed. It was better than any treadmill
work I’ve ever done. Fred should be in
the Olympics. Fred and I ran up and down behind the settee and up and down the
screen. I even opened the door and let in a wasp so Fred could run out.
I am proud to report
that Fred still suns on that porch since I’m a failure at lizard removal. I named him so Queen E could envision him as a
friend rather than a reptile. I think
that’s the category for lizards??? The Queen
was unimpressed with my reptile removal skills and my naming. She still wants the porch doors shut so he
won’t visit her room. Fred will have to
snuggle under the porch blankie today. I’ve
made it a point to shake it out before using it on a chilly evening.
Peace to all of you this Thanksgiving weekend. If you see Fred out he may be sporting a tiny
hounds tooth scarf so he’ll fit in with the rest of the crowd on the porch.
Karen Erwin-Brown is the director of the Valley office of
the Pastoral Institute. She offers
individual, marriage and family counseling by appointment only. Call 334-768-2341 to make an appointment or
more information.
mystery man? Probably scratching the hair in his ear
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